Light and Shade II

It’s a long time since I’ve read anything on DPReview’s forums, but in a fit of insanity, I’ve read quite a lot of posts on there recently. Why oh why oh why did I bother? The place is full of idiots finding non-existent faults on cameras with thousands of images betraying appalling technique but no sign of the alleged fault, who call anyone who can’t see the invisible defect an “enemy of progress”; or people who stick a camera into fully auto mode, hold it over their heads, and then blame the manufacturer that nothing is in focus; or those who shout out abuse of the manufacturer for things they’ve not yet actually resolved; or  - well, you get the drift – absolute nutters. Why can’t they just get out there and take a few pictures instead of spewing inanity and insanity?

If there’s anything more irritating in online forums, I’ve yet to find it. The fanboy – and he’s always male – is almost exclusively the owner of what might be termed a minority camera system, to whit Olympus or Pentax. His grasp on reality would most charitably be described as wafer-thin, and he is marked by an utterly unswerving loyalty to his chosen marque to a degree that is positively risible. Any comment about that marque that is not in the most glowing terms possible, and language so simple even the fanboy can understand it, is given as evidence of “bashing” the marque in question. Any magazine that dares to suggest that the cameras are in any tiny way not quite as good as those of Canon or Nikon in particular is thoroughly dishonest and has been bribed by the Evil Two. Anyone who chooses to buy any camera other than the fanboy’s favourite is a brainwashed buffoon who has been swayed by overwhelming marketing. Honestly, it’s almost funny, if it wasn’t so pathetic. The truth, of course, is that these people are desparately trying to live with their own buyer’s remorse, and failing fairly dismally, and their own insecurity is what makes them lash out. There is a rather related phenomenon, the “inverse fanboy” – this guy is actually a user of Canon or Nikon, but is forever complaining that the other marque is far better and that his chosen brand has let him down badly by not providing a particular function the other brand has – generally without actually understanding that function or having a need for it. People, eh?

This week, my target is those who don’t have a clue, but always have an opinion. Whatever the subject, they have some sort of rumbustious opinion based on prejudice and ignorance, never on facts and understanding. You can’t reason with them, because they’re so stuck in their prejudices; it would be nice to ignore them, but that’s not always possible. Goes without saying that they’re as thick as pigshit. Spare us from such people…

It takes a rare talent to cock up such an excellent race as yesterday’s Belgian Grand Prix, with thrilling racing and plenty of incidents. But it seems that the FIA have an embarassment of riches when it comes to such talent, and they’ve totally fucked up what should’ve been a golden opportunity for the sport to recover from recent negative publicity. There are those who insist that it’s all down to Hamilton not driving a red car, but I always prefer to believe in cock-up before conspiracy. In this case, it’s a sodding great cock-up in that it has reinforced the conspiracy theories amongst thousands of F1 followers, and can only do the sport immense damage in the long run. So my inaugural Fuckwit of the Week award goes to the FIA race stewards.